Can you have two fun parents?

Orlando and I share many of the same opinions when it comes to parenting. We're both pretty quick to get irritated by behavior that pushes boundaries. We both believe that it's important to learn table manners and restaurant etiquette at a very early age. We agree that it's okay for our kid to decide she doesn't like a particular food, but not before trying it. And we both have very high expectations in terms of her schooling. But, for as much as we have in common in our parenting styles, we often take very different approaches to raising our little girl.

Do you watch Modern Family? One of my favorite lines from the show is one in which Claire explains to her son Luke that she used to be fun, but that had to go away when she became a mom because you can't have two fun parents. "You know that kid Liam who wears pajama pants to school and pays for things with hundred dollar bills? Two fun parents". I'd like to believe that I'm a fun person, but when it comes to balancing out the parent roles, Anastasia herself will tell you that Orlando's the fun parent, and I'm the "mean" one. Don't get me wrong, he can be tough, too, but he's more likely to take a playful approach than me. For example:



Case in point: Anastasia finds distractions everywhere in the morning when she's supposed to be getting ready for school. I can't count how many times I've walked into her room to find her naked playing Barbies, or with one leg in a pair of tights reading a book. It would be funny (actually, who'm I kidding, it's hysterical), but we have a limited time to get ready in the morning, and if one of us is checking on her progress every minute, we're not getting ready ourselves. After what seemed like months of struggling to get her to focus in the mornings, I made a check list of her tasks and told her it was unacceptable for her to play/turn on the tv/read until everything on the list was completed. Meanwhile Orlando's approach appealed to her competitive nature. He challenged her to a race and told her each morning that he was going to win. Like I said, he's the fun one.

And the truth is, I'm actually okay with that. Sure, Orlando may be more likely to toss her into a giant pile of leaves, or start a pillow fight to wake her up in the morning. But I'm the one who plans the birthday parties (complete with personalized craft we do together) and makes Christmas ornaments with her every year so when she's grown, she'll have a tree's worth of decorations.



From him she gets her spontaneous, playful, goofy nature, from me she gets her more measured approach to challenges, joy at making and checking things off a list, and love of making things herself. All in all, I think we balance each other pretty nicely.